The Talk
by shiiki
Summary: Reyna has to deliver a certain Talk; Thalia convinces her that delegating tasks is a good thing. Unfortunately, they don't exactly check WHO they're delegating it to … [Christmas giftfic for Latiwings]


**Summary** : Reyna has to deliver a certain Talk; Thalia convinces her that delegating tasks is a good thing. Unfortunately, they don't exactly check _who_ they're delegating it to … (For **Latiwings** , who requested Nico, Will, and Hazel (Solangelo, background Frank/Hazel, optional Reyna/Thalia hints) with the following prompt: _Reyna insisted that Nico and Hazel needs the Talk, for safety purposes. Unfortunately, Will is the best qualified medic._ )

 **A/N** : Dear Latiwings, thank you for the prompt—it was a real challenge, and I enjoyed trying to work it in with the constraints of canon! I may have stretched things as far as they could go, made liberal use of italics, and taken a bunch of liberties with your prompt. I hope it still somewhat resembles what you were hoping for. Happy Christmas! 3

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 **The Talk**

 _A Christmas giftfic for_ _ **Latiwings**_

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If it had been any other girl, or even any other time, it might have just been all in a day's work for Reyna. In her time as praetor, she'd dealt with plenty of young female demigods panicking when their periods first arrived. She was pretty adept at sorting out such issues when they came up among the legionnaires.

But Hazel Levesque was a special case.

The daughter of Pluto was nearly fourteen, a bit on the late side to start menstruating, though not unusually so (and who knew what being pulled out of time and living in the Underworld for decades did to one's reproductive system), but that wasn't a problem in itself. The issue was that Aunt Flo had most conveniently paid her first visit to Hazel when she was practising shadow-travelling with her brother Nico.

Who burst into the infirmary like an army of giants was after him, dragging a woozy Hazel along.

'Reyna, help!' Nico gasped. 'Something's wrong with Hazel!'

Reyna looked up from the nasty claw gash she was bandaging (note to self, even the most docile automaton dogs hate getting a nail trim) and quickly assessed the situation. Hazel was leaning against Nico's shoulder, arms clutching her stomach, her face scrunched up in pain. They helped her over to a bed.

'What happened?'

'It was only a short hop! Just across to L.A.—but then she passed out and when I found her, she was like this—' Nico wrung his hands. 'And she's … _bleeding_. We tried ambrosia, but that just made her stomach hurt.'

'Bleeding?' Reyna said sharply. Then she noticed the tell-tale stain around the crotch of Hazel's pants. 'Oh. Nico, I think it's just—Hazel, is this the first time you've gotten your period?'

'My—what?' Hazel said faintly.

'Your—' Reyna frowned. What did they call it in the 1940's? 'You know, your, er, monthly cycle?'

'Reyna, she's _hurt_. Can we talk about cycles later?'

'Nico, it's fine. This is totally normal. Hazel's just going to have to deal with cramps and stuff for a bit.'

Nico looked as though she'd suggested they perform some barbaric ritual, like burying Hazel in dirt or hanging her by her ankles until she felt better. 'She's _bleeding!_ '

'Yes, I know—' Reyna sighed. 'Nico, go warm up a heat pack. I'm going to get Hazel cleaned up.'

He clearly thought she'd lost her mind, but he obeyed.

Ten minutes later, having fixed Hazel up with a pad and a heat pack to ease her cramps, Reyna stood back and faced the two of them with her arms crossed.

'Nico … Hazel … has anyone ever told you—has anyone given you two … the Talk?'

They exchanged a mystified look.

'What talk?' Hazel asked.

'The _Talk._ About the … um …' How had Hylla put it when she'd sat Reyna down for the most embarrassing conversation of their sisterhood? 'The facts of life,' she finished lamely.

Nico looked at Reyna as though she was crazy. 'Er, Reyna, we _know_ we're demigods. You don't need to talk to us about that.'

Reyna pinched the skin of her forehead together. Explaining the birds and the bees to a clueless pair of Underworld children had definitely _not_ been on her agenda today.

Fortunately, Hazel finally seemed to catch on. 'You mean … like how babies get made, don't you?'

Relieved, Reyna nodded. But then Hazel started a convoluted explanation involving interfering nuns and Hail Mary's and divine intervention—which was not exactly impossible given their heritage, but wasn't the most reliable when it came to conception _or_ contraception. Reyna groaned. Obviously _someone_ needed to explain certain facts to Nico and Hazel. It was a matter of _safety_ , after all.

Hazel was easy enough to deal with. Reyna had had this conversation on occasion with younger legionnaires; she mostly repeated what Hylla had told her at age ten about their bodies preparing for reproduction.

What was she going to do with Nico, though? Hylla's old speech about puberty hadn't exactly been tailored to a male audience (and if memory served her right, it had involved many snide remarks about subjugating men. Some of which might not have been entirely figurative.)

Reyna sighed. 'Nico, can I talk to Hazel in private? Come back in half an hour.'

That bought her some time. But twenty minutes later, having explained to Hazel that yes, she was going to have to deal with her period every month from now on, and no, Hail Mary's did not work as birth control, Reyna was back at square one trying to figure out how to deliver the Talk to a fourteen-year-old boy.

She'd have shanghaied Frank into duty as her new fellow praetor, but something told her that would make a particularly awkward conversation between a dude and his sister's boyfriend.

She was still scratching her head (and panicking slightly as the seconds ticked away) when the creak of the window drew her attention.

A second later, Thalia Grace, head Hunter of Artemis, slid into the infirmary.

'Do you ever come in the normal way?' Reyna said. Being five minutes away from impending disaster made her snappish.

Thalia raised her eyebrows. 'Someone's in a mood.'

Reyna pinched her forehead again. 'Sorry. It's just—I have a real headache.'

'Anything coffee can cure?'

'Unless coffee can give the Talk for me.'

Thalia made a face. 'Perks of being the leader, huh?'

'At least _your_ Hunters are all girls. Less awkwardness there. And no issues with out-of-control hormones.'

'Don't tell me you have to give the talk to a _boy?_ ' Thalia stared to laugh. 'Shouldn't that be my brother's job?'

'You forget he's no longer praetor.'

'So get his replacement to do it.'

'Uh, trust me, that's not a good idea.'

Thalia pursed her lips. Then her eyes lit up and she grinned. 'Well, it's your lucky day. Guess who else hitched a ride here with Apollo?'

'What, you brought an entourage?'

'No, silly. His son came to visit. His son, who happens to be a fully qualified medic.'

'Seriously?'

'Would I lead you on?'

Reyna raised her eyebrows. 'You really want me to answer that?'

Thalia looped her arm through Reyna's. 'Look, he's a guy, he knows his anatomy, and he has medical training. Perfect for your needs. Let him handle it, save yourself an awkward conversation, and come out for coffee with me instead. You did promise me last time you were going to show me that place on University Square …'

Thalia's fingers danced over the inside of Reyna's elbow. Reyna wasn't sure if it was this or the logic behind her argument that was more persuasive.

'The perks of being a leader—you get to delegate.' Thalia winked.

'Well, when you put it that way …'

Fifteen minutes later, Will Solace made his way to the Camp Jupiter infirmary, having been waylaid by the Roman praetor and told that there was a camper in need of his services.

He hadn't realised giving the Talk would be under his purview as a medic, but it sort of made sense. And he guessed it'd be better for the poor dude to hear it from him than from a pair of scary warrior girls.

It was crappy timing, though. He'd been hoping to surprise Nico with his impromptu visit. His boyfriend did so much travelling from camp to camp; Will thought Nico would appreciate the effort he'd taken in coming to find him for once. He hoped he could get this health lecture over with before someone mentioned to Nico that—

' _Will?_ '

Will's jaw dropped. He had just pushed open the infirmary door and there was Nico himself, sitting on one of the beds, kicking idly at its leg.

He shut his mouth quickly and collected himself. 'Er, surprise?'

'You came all this way to find me?'

'Well, yeah. I thought it'd be nice for a change. Besides, you're always saying you wish I could see the place, so … here I am.'

A cute pink flush spread across Nico's cheeks, by which Will gathered that his boyfriend was pleased to see him.

'I'll show you around later,' Nico promised. 'But someone's supposed to give me a _talk_ now.'

'Wait, _you're_ supposed to get the Talk?' Will stared at him. 'Reyna asked _me_ to give—oh. Oh no. No way.' He started to pace the room. 'Why does Reyna think you need—'

'What _is_ this talk thing, anyway?' Nico asked. 'Hazel said it involved babies and sneaking past nuns, but—'

Will stopped dead. 'Wait, _what?_ '

'I knew that couldn't be right!'

Will had no clue how nuns had gotten into the picture. He wasn't sure he wanted to know. 'She meant the sex talk, Nico.'

'The …' Blood drained from Nico's face, making him look like he'd just pulled a transcontinental shadow jump. 'Oh. She wants _you_ to teach _me_ about sex?'

'She … really doesn't now about us, does she?'

Their eyes met, and after a pause, they both started to laugh.

'Well,' Will said, 'this could be the most awkward conversation we've ever had.'

'For the record, I know what sex is. Maybe not the stuff about babies and nuns, but I sorta know what happens. But—er—I guess I'd want to at some point—um, not with a _girl_ , but with …' Colour rushed back into his face, giving him a flustered look that was beyond adorable. 'I don't mean—I'm not sure I'm ready to … you know …' His eyes flickered towards Will's and then looked down quickly.

'Gods, no. I wasn't suggesting we …' Will ran a hand over his face and took a deep breath. 'Okay, how about this. Can we talk about this, like, really clinically? I'll, er, enlighten you about the girl stuff—it's good to know even if we don't want to deal with it—and the rest of it …'

Nico twisted his skull ring around his finger. 'It's not that I don't want to. Just, um, some day?'

'We can just agree to figure it out together over time. How's that?'

'Deal,' Nico said. He looked up with a shy smile. 'But, um … is making out still on the table?'

'Making out is very much on the table,' Will agreed, hopping up on the infirmary bed next to him. 'But first, let's get this talk out of the way.'

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 **A/N** : I'm so excited for this giftfic posting week! There'll be a little something (or two) coming along for each day until the end of December, so stay tuned! The next giftfic will be for **CupcakeQueen816**!


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